2nd May 2010

Our early departure from Shanghai left us both feeling a bit glum, cut short before we’d had our fill of dumplings and neon skylines. But landing at Heathrow brought a strange sort of relief, especially knowing we could finally relieve Charlotte of her saintly watch over Jamie and Sarah. Parenting by proxy is noble but exhausting.

Home, thankfully, was still standing, always a bonus, and both garden and pool had survived our absence without staging a rebellion. Strangely, the house appeared deserted… until Lucas came squealing down the stairs like a human firework and launched into an hour-long display of hyperactivity. I was swiftly enlisted to repair his new bike, chase him round the garden, and bounce relentlessly on the trampoline until his small body finally began to lose momentum. Poor Charlotte looked like she could do with a fortnight in a spa. We waved her and Lucas off the following afternoon, and I imagine she skipped back to Suraj with joy, especially as Lucas was set to start swimming lessons on Monday, and who would want to dodge those soggy logistics?

Life has now returned to a more familiar rhythm, albeit one dampened by the delightfully grey British spring. Sue threw herself back into school gossip for three days, while I busied myself sowing seeds in the greenhouse and restarted my morning cycle rides (though the wind seemed to want to personally thwart my efforts).

Unexpectedly, Roger Woolnough took me out to lunch, a long-overdue IOU, apparently, and we chatted about our upcoming jaunt to Italy to see Joan and Phillip. We agreed we’re mostly going for Joan’s pasta and a break from Leicestershire drizzle.

Sarah, battling a persistent cold, heroically dragged herself into school until her immune system waved the white flag on Wednesday. She retreated to bed for a day, justifiably. She did, however, earn an ‘A’ in a Sociology essay, which I gallantly attempted to read, and promptly gave up on, lest I sprain something in my brain.

Jamie continues to rise with the lark for work, and Harley, the current girlfriend, appears still to be very much ‘in the frame’. For his 21st, he headed to Bournemouth with a gaggle of mates. It sounds like a successful knees-up, though getting Jamie to part with details is like extracting molars from a crocodile. I did my bit by taking his car to the garage after one of the wheel nuts, newly fitted, had been cross-threaded, no doubt by someone with the mechanical aptitude of a teabag. During its brief hospitalisation, he shared a lift with a workmate from Harborough and survived the ordeal.

Friday night found me at the Leicestershire Referees’ Annual Dinner at the Walker Stadium, a rather swanky black-tie affair. The guest speaker, former Welsh rugby union player Jamie Robertson, proved to be as entertaining off the pitch as he was on it.

Saturday brought an important Harborough RUFC match against Spalding with promotion hanging in the balance. I was, however, summoned by the club bar steward to cover an inter-county game at our ground between Leicestershire and Essex; all other committee members had deserted us in favour of the big away game. I fulfilled my duties, said ‘Grace’ at the post-match dinner (nailing the Amen with suitable gravitas), and enjoyed a pint with the players. I was then presented with a plaque on behalf of the club, which I promptly tucked behind the bar for safekeeping. As for the results: Leicestershire trounced Essex at home, while Harborough narrowly lost away, proving that home advantage really is a thing.

Meanwhile, Nan has made a bid for independence and headed to Wales to see her sister Josie. A kindly Welsh cousin chauffeured her to Brymbo, and the pair have booked a show in London with a hotel stay thrown in, high society indeed. When I rang, they were out playing bingo (obviously), but I caught Nan the next day. She sounded chirpy and gave no indication of returning soon, and frankly, who can blame her?

Finally, poor Charlotte has done her back in and is suffering for it. As a result, Lucas will be staying with us this weekend while she and Suraj attend a friend’s wedding. We shall ready the trampoline, lubricate the bicycle, and prepare for joyful chaos.